Mama's Favorite Things

One of my favorite things has always been morning snuggles.  This pregnancy I love my bed.  Maybe it is because it is so cold I don't know.  Most mornings the kids come and snuggle with me.  This is when we do our morning pray and sing praise and worship songs. 

I love that during snuggle time Thomas wants to rub, kiss and talk to Mama's belly.  He loves the baby.  He makes me laugh when he says "your baby is cute" as if he can see the baby.  The other children also love to rug my belly but they don't get to do as much rubbing because Thomas doesn't share Mama well.  Snuggle time is the best! 

What are some of your favorite things?

Please continue to pray for me as I continue to pray for you.  God Bless. 

It Is Real

Yesterday we had our first appointment with our new/old doctor (obgyn).  It was a family trip because Michael  wanted to be there to ask the doctor some questions he had.  I usually feel like the crazy lady bringing three children to my appointment but then add dad.  Now I feel like people are pointing and laughing.  I know three children seems small but in our two children culture going to my doctor's office with three in tow and one on the way makes me feel like the freak show.  Then add dad and for some reason I feel like we are just over doing it.

The visit was quick.  We were seen with minutes of arriving (lets get the crazy people out of here) and the doctor was shortly behind. 

It was confirmed that I chose the correct doctor, Dr. B.  I am, apparently, unforgettable because six years later she remembers me well.  She remembers the good, the bad, and the ugly.  So do I.  As I shared before, in Doctor Dilemma, the good outweighs the bad and the ugly. 

What do I like about Dr. B.  She has a great bed side manner but at the same time is straight forward.  The fact that she remembers me (really remembers me) and she is still willing to work with me is helpful.  She said, I know you had wanted to go as far as you could (without interventions with my other pregnancies) in past pregnancies and a natural birth but that is not an option now.  We will have to be sure to take precautions, not to say that we did not with the other pregnancies.  Now that I am at advance maternal age, diabetic, have had 4 previous pregnancies (not sure what this has to do with the price of beans) and have had a baby with fatal demise we need to deliver this baby when his/her lungs are  fully developed.  Guess what she didn't say?  We will have to deliver this baby at 36 weeks.  In fact she said the opposite, we will need to start increase ultrasounds in the third trimester and watch all the signs that this baby is ready.  In the end, I walked out feeling like she was going to be respectful to me and cautious at the same time.  This along with the vision I have in mind for delivery and holding my baby after birth are all I ask.  Dr. B is meeting both of those needs. 

The most difficult part of this, and every, appointment I have will be when they try to find babies heart beat.  My fear that she won't hear it will always be there.  This time we were all there waiting to hear the baby's heartbeat.  Everyone's reaction was different.  Adriana smiled with joy, James said "what was that noise, and Thomas was excited to hear the baby moving.  Finally Michael said "Now it is real!"  Really, now it is real. I guess that's what it took for his reality to set in. 

Well now it is real and next week we have our 18 week ultrasound.  Please pray for us as we continue to pray for you!  God Bless. 

This post is linked up to:

Thomas' Baby Name

It is so funny, Thomas has named this baby.  I have no idea where the name came from but my guess is it is from Peter. 

What is the name you ask?  The name Thomas has decided on is Frances(is).  Good thing it can be used for either a boy or girl. Too bad it is already used and we won't be using it again.  I hope he isn't sad when the baby comes and has a different name.  Maybe we should start talking about that now. 

Do your kids have names they want to name your baby?   

This post is linked- up

Sixteen Weeks

Today I am 16 weeks. 

 

 

 

Praise God!!  I am one week further in my pregnancy.  I am thankful for every week closer to having this baby.  We everyday more I get to spend with Baby Niall #6.

 

Continue to pray for me as I pray for you.  God Bless. 

Doctor Dilemma

Last week, after writing the blog post Two Doctors in 2 Days, someone told me that Newton/Wellesley Hospital is one of the best in state for preforming cesareans.  That is when I decided to I looked up a doctor I used to delivery James.  I will say one of her down falls is she is the doctor that pretty much forced me into having a cesarean with James.  That story is here.  Up until that point I had a lot respect for her but I did not trust her.  I did not trust any doctor/midwives.  I trusted my body.

 I still believe I was rushed into surgery for no reason.  I don't think that she sees it my way but at this point having a cesarean is now my path so it doesn't matter.  I think she did what she felt was the best thing for me.  We had other battles because I am head strong and didn't want interventions or another caesarean.  In hind sight I do trust her because I believe she was doing what she felt was best for me and baby.  I will do what ever she asks of me in light of what happened with Peter.  This time I will be totally compliant.  I am not fighting anymore.  All I want in the end is a baby in my arms. 

Why my dilemma?  Well once I decided on my doctor I had a few people tell my about a Catholic doctor in Boston.  I called her and although she was nice the hospital and I suspect her policy for baby care after birth don't make me happy.  The is not the same with Doctor A.  I agree with their hospital policy and  it is exactly what I was looking for.   

I want a healthy baby to be brought right to me.  I remember not being able to hold Thomas, at a different hospital, for what felt like forever.  I can't image that happening again.  I want baby with me as soon as possible.  Doctor A was also really good at surgery and she was very respectful while preforming the surgery not talking about anything other than the task at hand. 

That was my deciding factor.  I would like to go to a doctor who is Catholic but my doctors from Newton/Wellesley were always respectful to  my believes that was never our issue.  My doctor was tough on me and made tough chooses I didn't like.  I think this is important.  She has proven herself to me. 

When I talked to Michael about my dilemma he said he thinks I will be happier with Doctor A.  My husband knows me best so I may not always trust my own judgment but I definitely trust my husbands. 

If things don't work with Doctor A we can always call Doctor B. 

Please continue to pray for me as I am praying for you!

Healthy Baby

I mentioned in the post Two Doctors in 2 Days that of my both doctors said my baby has increased chances of birth defects.  What does that mean to me?  Is it scary?  Yes, it is a little scary but not as scary as losing a baby.  It means that I once again need to trust God.  He knows what is best for my life and He will do in me what is His will. 

On retreat this weekend the priest, Fr. Emmerich Vogt, started his talk with the Serenity Pray:

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is,

not as I would have it;

Trusting that You will make all the things right if I surrender to Your Will;

so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next. 

Amen.   

Do I blame myself?  NO.  Could I avoid the birth defects?  Well there is a 3.8% higher chance of having a baby with birth defects if blood sugars are high in the first trimester because baby is developing.  This is my 5th baby and the first time I have heard of this.  Maybe I should have known.  I did not and that makes me sad but I can not change my past.  One of Fr. Emmerich's favorite quotes is "Give up on the hope of a better past."  He told us this on retreat this week.  Who knew I needed to hear this?  God.  I can't chance what I didn't know, I can't even chance the past 13 weeks of my  life.  I can only trust God knows what he is doing.  I AM going to choose to trust that God knows exactly what He is doing in my life. 

I continue to ask for your prayers.  I am praying for you.  God Bless!

Happy Tears!

No I really didn't cry but I am so happy that I heard my baby's heart beat today.  Best sound ever! 

 

 

 

Thanks for you prayers. 

 

Tomorrow I will tell you why I hate doctors and what is coming next in my journey. 

No Wait I Mean YES!

On December 23rd I went to the Dollar Tree and purchased a pregnancy test.  It was negative.  I have always used Dollar Tree pregnancy test and they have always but right.  I was sad but it was what I excepted. 

Yes we want more children but I never know if I can even get pregnant again.  I am diabetic and have polycystic ovaries (PCOS) and with that combo I am lucky to have had four pregnancies. 

Four days later I still had no premenstrual signs so I figured what's the harm I'll go to CVS and pick up another pregnancy test. 

It was the morning of the third day of Christmas, Dec 27th, and my husband was already suspicious.  I was in shock.  How could it be?  This is not the month I thought it would happen.  I had months that I was eating healthier.  Okay God you are so mysterious.  This time the test said yes!

I went right down to Michael's office and gave him his third Day of Christmas present.  I had to ask him to check for me because I was truly in disbelief.  I was right.  He was so happy!   

Me well as happy as I was I was still confused and not totally sure what to believe. I was tricked.  No and now yes, guess I won't be using those dollar tree tests again. 

This was the beginning of my rollercoaster ride.